Pots and Lids.
Love is: Finding your lid.
“There is a pot for every lid.” It was an Italian proverb that my nunny would quote me on a weekly basis. I began the search years ago. No matter how many times I was convinced I had found that special someone. He would not be my lid. To this day I am convinced, the manufacturer of these pots and lids misplaced mine or didn’t pass customs.
Often enough, I think about all the lids I did attempt. Disappointment and heartache started early. When I was about five, there was Lucas. He lived across the street. One day he was riding a bright yellow big wheel. It was a big thing back in the day. After a few spins from corner to corner he encouraged me to cross the street. Indeed I did. Perhaps that is where it all went wrong. For several years, we would play this game. In high school, after he was sent to prison I realize he, too, wasn’t my lid.
Nonetheless, I debated on who was my real lid and why did it go so wrong when all the roads led to him. Jay. He will always be the one who I wanted to be my lid. I wanted him to fit. The beginning was so beautiful. He came into my life and so did the words. Stories began to flow into my mind and onto paper. This great discovery lead me onto a path where writing would become my life journey. Perhaps that is all Jay was meant to do. He opened a creative doorway. Sometimes, I feel teetered to him and he visits in my dreams. It turned out no matter how much I wanted him to fit, to be that lid--it turned out he wasn’t. Fate had something else in store.
Luray. I meet at a New Year’s Eve blast. We kissed at midnight and the relationship lasted eighteen months. He is the reason I chose to tape a map of the United States to my living room wall and toss a dart at it. I came to the conclusion my lid isn’t out there and it is time to start over. I turned my back to the wall, and tossed the dart over my shoulder. With a thud, I prayed it wasn’t California. With my luck, it would slide off into the ocean and we would all sink. With that one simple toss, the Universe guided me to my new life in Lexington, Kentucky.